Ronan Keating ft. Yusuf Islam (Cat Stevens)-Father And Son
It's not time to make a change
Just relax, take it easy
You're still young, that's your fault
There's so much you have to know
Find a girl, settle down
If you want, you can marry
Look at me, I am old
But I'm happy

I was once like you are now
And I know that it's not easy
To be calm when you've found
Something going on
But take your time, think a lot
Well think of everything you've got
For you will still be here tomorrow
But your dreams may not

How can I try to explain
When I do he turns away again
It's always been the same
Same old story;
From the moment I could talk
I was ordered to listen
Now there's a way and I know
That I have to go away
I know I have to go

I was once like you are now
And I know that it's not easy
To be calm when you've found
Something going on
But take your time, think a lot
Well think of everything you've got
For you will still be here tomorrow
But your dreams may not

All the times that I've cried
Keeping all the things I knew inside
It's hard, but it's harder
To ignore it
If they were right I'd agree
But it's them they know, not me
Now there's a way and I know
That i have to go away
I know I have to go





IP PW IP PW IP PW IP PW IP PW IP PW!!!!!
dang it..!! Haha!!
I got an idea for my PW!! YAY!!!
Problem is, how do i go about it..?
Anyway, i found the song why doing research and has become part of my research..
Make sense..? NOT!! haha
And i kinda liked it for no apparent reason..

Anyway, i dedicate this song to my dad when the time comes..
Whether im going oversea for studies, NS, getting married or something..
I know you'll read this dad!!..Sooner or later.. haha..
All i am know is because of you..

Peace..

-For you will still be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not..

THE ALL-AMERICAN REJECTS - IT ENDS TONIGHT

Your subtleties
They strangle me
I can't explain myself at all.
And all that wants
And all that needs
All I don't want to need at all.

The walls start breathing
My minds unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight
It ends tonight.

A falling star

Least I fall alone.
I can't explain what you can't explain.
Your finding things that you didn't know
I look at you with such disdain

The walls start breathing
My minds unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

[Chorus]
When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight will make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.

Now I'm on my own side
It's better than being on your side
It's my fault when your blind
It's better that I see it through your eyes

All these thoughts locked inside
Now you're the first to know

[Chorus x2]

I just love the fireworks.

Happy new year guys..

Almost all the time,
To not disappoint one, you disappoint so many others..
So which one should i disappoint? The one or the many?
What about me..?

Months of sitting around doing nothing , i feel like i've lost something..
So what..
Getting my driving license..
Getting through promos..
Getting my head SMASHED ON A LAMPOST!!..
So what...
This sucks..
Things WILL NOT get easier..
It never does..
Never will..
Never ever..

Hari raya eh..
Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri, everyone..
Forgive me for all my past mistakes and things i've done that have intentionally or unintentionally hurt you..
Still, this year..
A very typical hari raya for me..
A great occasion..
Yet it opened my eyes on a few things..
A lot of things..
Somethings i find hard to forgive..
Somethings i may never be able to forgive..
Hee..

Still..
All this while, people see me as a carefree person who dosen't seemed to have problems..
All this while, i pushed aside the stupid things people said about me and treat it as a joke..
Call me stupid, fine.. Call me useless, fine.. Laugh at my stupidity, fine.. Shout at me at things i didn't do, fine.. I'll just put on that stupid smile and act as if nothing happened..
BUT DON"T GO OVERBOARD DAMN IT!!..
Forgive me.. Selamat hari raya..

I try to change.. Alot of times..
But sometimes people are holding me back.. They have a fixed view of what i am..
I cannot blame anyone for that.. Its typical..

Anyway, im just talking crap here.. Don't take it to heart..
The purpose me writing this is to actually let out the things, and if possible, seek forgiveness..
The bad feeling i have towards you before, is probably unintentional..
Like i said before, i never see the bad in people...
But if you see a bad in me, thats something i will never know...
Even if i do, i will try to change.. If you give me a chance... Learn from mistakes ne..

Selamat hari raya..
Maaf zahir batin..

- Just, try..

A figurative, an expression..
It means no matter how far a person go, he/she will return to the place he was initially..

In my case, i tried running away from the stress that have been in me lately..
A stress in a case whereby i had my mid-year examination last week..
I've suffered insomia, headache, fatique, aches and so on..
Yet, i manage myself well..
The problem now is, i don't know how my results may turn out..
So, forgetting the problem is my main priority at this time..

As a matter in fact, i so called ran away to Malaysia last weekend..
For a relative wedding..
Kampong style...
With kampong chicken and mosquitoes as big as flies..

Watched superman returns..
Lois is engage is have a son who apperantly also happens to be superman's son..
A thought came to me, "When the hell did they 'do' it.."

At midnight, on an almost deserted stretch of road..
The fast and the furious is on the way..
Imagine cars lining up on that road for a race..
EXCEPT, the vehicle is only those 'kapcai' motorbikes..
They zoomed passed our vehicle..
And i swear i saw fire shooting out from their mufflers from changing gears..
Or izzit nitro..?
haha
Kewl man..

Bought an Adidas Predator absolute..
For RM75..!! YEAH!!
Fake...? NO WAY MAN..
Those same shoes from the original Adidas retail shop cost up to RM175+...
Which are made from the western countries..
This one's probably is made in those eastern countries..
So original...? YES!!! Made from China.. Says so on the shoe..
It has alot nicer sole though..
Haha...

There's something to be happy about..
But.. although my stress is almost gone..
SCHOOL SSTARTS TOMORROW!!!!
So yeah..
I can assume that my stress in flood back to me like the tsunami that hit Indonesia..
So yeah.. Like what the expression says..
No matter how far i run away from my troubles, i am bound to came back to it..
S*&T..!! haha
But hey, school's fun right..?


-A voice from deep down of you, thats calling out to make you realise.. -Westlife: Fragile heart

I'm blogging for the sake of updating..
Its been so long..
Where do i start..?
It'll be quick i guess..
..........
Okay....
..........
Carnival day... 20/05/06..

My class is so HAPPENING!!!!!..
We sold fishes, terapins..., crab..?
Kewl..
06C4 PAE batch came by..Too bad some didn't make it..
Its not like they die or anything.. Just Busy...
My whole family came down too.. yea!!


.................
BIG walk... 21-05-06.....

Not bad... Its just damn TIRING!!!...
10km worth of walking on a hot humid day....
Achievement.? Yea i guess...
Too bad we four yishun gang didn't meet the rest though...

.....................
GP Mid year exam.. 26-05-06....

WTH!!!..
Confusion.. My name didn't appear in the class(es) in suppose to be in..!!
Luckily it was resolved..
If not ar.. i might as well.. err.. Go NS..? haha
I cannot say the exam is easy, neither can i say it is hard..
Lets just say its good enough to pass...

The whole test ends around 11am..
Met up with my dad for Friday prayer...
To Sultan Mosque we went and bumped into my Uncle...
After that... We hunt for a new fridge..
We've got a new refrigerator people!!!! haha!!
Its soo big that it cannot, repeat, CANNOT fit through the door..
Or izzit the door is small...?
Disasembly was required before putting it inside..

......................

Other Stuffs...........


Lets see... This yellow bird came into my house..
So as usual, mom caught it..
Thinking it was a wild bird.. We let it free..
But the thing is, it didn't leave..
So it ran wild in the house.. Allowing us to have close contact with it..
One precaution we take is to switch off the ceiling fan..
If not ar, it flew ar, and PIAK!!!.. aliyuyah..
haha
It finaly decides to leave after about a 3 day visit..

Next.. PC crashed... And i cannot reboot it...!!
Damn...
Bloody old stupid PC.. i'm sick and tired of maintaining it..
Why izzit always hanging..?
ARRRGG...

Today...
Math Class..!!!
Why izzit so hard to understand..???
Many say that H1 subjects are easier than H2 subjects...
But why do i find my ALL my H1 subjects harder...?
What Irony..
We came an hour early...
And we thought we were late..
What irony..
So we kill time by buying food at 7-11...
After the class..
We had lunch at Jurong point Banquet..
Aiyo..
Overall.. from 10bucks spent untill left 20cent..

Had fun today... That all..
And did i say it'll be quick..
For you to read this, maybe la..
But for me to write this.. 1 hour tops..
have fun people..

Slow and steady wins the race..?

Hiaz.. I just got back home an 2 hour ago and i'm tired as hell..
I've attended the MI sports meet just now at Toa Payoh stadium...
Nothing special.. Just the same old boring proseduer..
The only best part of it is getting there, and going home.. haha..

















But thats not the issue anyway..
Currently, i'm am tired.. Both mentally and physically..
I met an old friend a few days back..
He's change, into kind person i find hard to accept..
Then i've been thinking..
What kind of a person am i..?
Am i some useless guy, a burden, an unworthy person..?
Am i just some remote control, finding it hard to say no to any help people needed.?
How have i helped to change the people around me..?
Have i make them see the better part of life..?
Have i shown them that doing whats right is always the best..?
What am i to them..?
Am i a good friend, someone trustworthy,honourable..?
Or am i just some shadow who keeps bothering..?

Thing is, i don't really understand what's been happening around me..
I've been thinking how much the people around me change me..
But i don't know how much i've return it to them..
Why do people change..? i asked myself..
How much do i play a part..?
All these questions i asked..
I know the answers.. People told them to me directly..
"Kau lah harapan Bapak.."
"You are a special person who make a difference to a class.."
"Thanks Khidir.."
But, I don't know how much am i to believe them..
Those close to me have a lot of faith in me..
I guess i'm just afraid if i can't fulfill it...
How would that change things..?

Also, i've heard stories of friends getting sick of each other..
The irritaion, fake smiles, etc..
But, why can't i see it..
The changes in people..
The issues that have been leaking... Yet i am unaware of it..
Why can't i see the bad in a person..?
Am i too good for my own good...?
Man..!! I hate myself sometimes..
WHY!!!

This entry sounds like a suicidal person wrote it..
haha.. I'm not by the way..
Its just that i have to let this go somewhere..
Just to stop this train of thoughts..
haha..
Its hard to find peace for my mind..

peace people..

-All of us are defects in this world -> Gundam seed destiny ep 49, Rey..